It’s the Toys ‘R’ Us catalogue that has irritated me this time. We got a thick one in the mail the other day with their Christmas theme. The whole thing basically repulsed me. The toys were almost all made of plastic and looked like they would break within a week of being received. Many of the toys had violent themes. And what bothered me the most about it was the sexism.

The section marked “Dolls� was colored coded (or shall I say *gender coded*) in pink. Every single one of the children pictured on those pages was a girl. What, boys aren’t supposed to play with dolls? Well, considering the doll pictures were mostly of the “Bratz� variety, I guess I should be glad my son won’t be playing with them. But I should note that I won’t be letting me daughter play with “Bratz� either.

I also noticed that not a single girl was pictured playing with anything mechanical or that had wheels. Evidently girls don’t play with trucks, or cars either. They also don’t seem to play with sports equipment.

So what message is Toys ‘R’ Us telling parents about their girls? I suppose it is that girls should just play with dolls, like Bratz, which happen to emphasize the importance of makeup, fashion, jewelry, and the lack of any discernable muscle tone or body fat.

I’ve been thinking more and more lately about how this sexism affects my son, too. There was a day when I was very focused on how our society hurts women. But ever since my son was born, I’ve been paying more attention to how the stereotypes affect men also. My sister, who works at a women’s shelter, has brought to my attention the importance of raising healthy sons. What’s more, she gave me a copy of a book, Boys Will Be Men , that helped me to see how little boys can be just as damaged and limited by the sexism going on in our culture. I probably should have thought more about that without having a book tell me that, but I guess in the past I was just more focused on my own issues as a woman than the problems that both genders have. Just as I want my daughter to be able to play with trucks and hammers if she likes, I also want my son to be able to play with dolls.

I know – the problem is larger than the Toys ‘R’ Us catalogue. But for today, I’m still giving them a big fat thumbs-down.

Here’s a picture of my son wearing an outfit that Arp proudly picked out for him. (Mommy comment: He was so small then! I can’t believe he’s going to be 4 in just a few weeks!)

And here he is trying to hoard the doll that was given to J. This doll is still regularly fought over, resulting in many tears between them. I think I will be buying another doll this Christmas so they can both have one.