If our son ‘turns gay,’ this may be why
We got him pull-ups for night-time - pink trimmed, Dora the Explorer pull-ups. This may well turn him gay - I’ve heard quite reliable reports from all across America that anything remotely feminine will turn a growing boy gay. Considering M’s already had a pink sleeping sac, flowery onesies, a dollhouse, a doll (given to J but appropriated by M), a Hello Kitty dress-up doll, a Hello Kitty blanket, a Hello Kitty backpack, and a Hello Kitty toothbrush, this may well be the point of no return. Gayness, here we come!
Of course, I’m kidding - you’re either gay or you’re not. But judging by some of the comments people tend to make, you’d think there was some sort of tangible connection between interacting with physical objects and homosexuality. Like boy clothing having no pinks or lavenders, or girl clothes with no dark blues. Or boys being guided towards vehicles and ‘action’ figures and girls getting feminine dolls and play cooking utensils.
That kinda stuff doesn’t fly in our house. How would we know whether aggression or demureness is a major aspect of our children’s personalities already? Why would we send them clear messages that one should hide his feelings and the other shouldn’t? It makes no sense. For all those guys who want their boys to be ‘real men,’ which I presume involves growing up to be a virile ‘ladies man,’ your kids would probably have a better chance with the ladies if they were allowed to be aware of and expressive of their feelings and they developed a good sense of empathy.
Having a boy & a girl seems to amplify things quite a bit, since we get to experience both sides of the issue. It seems a lot more pronounced with J, who’s been called coy or flirty countless times. Somehow, just being shy doesn’t cut it - there has to be a sexual undertone to her behavior. This irks us to no end. While she is probably aware the some people are boys and some are girls, we’re pretty damn sure that her behavior has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with her personality. M doesn’t get as many comments since he’s rather loud and rambunctious at times. Of course, J is also rather loud and rambunctious, and climbs more and gets into way more stuff than M ever did at the same age, but that behavior isn’t as noticed as the occasional misconstrued shyness
I also wonder how guiding behavior based on presumptions affect things developmentally. J enjoys playing with vehicles a lot, especially if there are moving or removable parts involved. M has spent quite a bit of time caring for ‘his baby,’ especially when he copied our behavior after J was born. When a child is growing and learning, experiencing different things can only have a positive effect on development. Let any child play regularly with Legos, Tinkertoys or blocks and I’m confident that regardless of gender, they’ll grow up with some positive benefits to their ability to reason spacially. The same goes for playing with dolls and dollhouses and hopefully learning the basics of sympathy & empathy in the process.
Here’s the pink sleep sac that started us down the primrose path of dalliance…
