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Hard to write

23 January 2009 3 views 3 Comments

If anyone’s noticed, I haven’t been writing much lately.  Ever since this pregnancy began, way back in the summer, I’ve found it very hard to sit down and write very much.  First it was the morning sickness and utter fatigue of the first trimester that stopped me.  Now, in my second trimester, new issues have cropped up.  I think my pubic bone is cracked and misaligned, so much of the time I feel fairly crippled.  I’ve also had bouts of sciatica that have made me consider amputating at least one butt and thigh.  And finally, something about pregnancy tends to make me more introspective and less likely to write publicly.  I’ve thought of, and even started, many blogs posts, but finishing them just doesn’t seem to get done.  It’s hard to motivate myself to actually write it all out.  Thankfully, this is a blog with two writers, and Arp has taken over well.

I’ve also been incredibly busy packing and getting ready for our Great Move.  While Arp often seems to be happy about shedding stuff, it’s been hard for me sometimes.  Remember those seven bags of baby clothes that Arp bragged about sending to Goodwill last week?  They were a little harder for me to shed freely.  You see, I had imagined in the past that all my babies would wear them.  Already, so many cute outfits have been worn by both M and J.  For instance, the white terry footed PJ with the ducky that M wore home from the hospital was also worn by J right after she was born at home.  Is it practical for Costa Rica?  Well, maybe not, but I had to save it.  Along with quite a few other outfits that will be shipped by barrel to our new home.  Maybe this is why packing for an international move while pregnant is a bad idea?

Another thing that has been hard is our book situation.  I’m a bit of a book collector, as my father was before me.  When I was little, I well remember the feel of our swerving blue station wagon with the fake-wood trim as we made a quick turn to follow the signs for a yard sale on a warm summer morning.  The big lure for the both of us was always books.  In my childhood house, we had a big, well lit attic in which you could stand.  Lining all walls were floor to ceiling bookcases filled with books.  Shakespeare, all the plays, with books giving commentary.  Beat poets.  Old Hardy Boys and Nancy Drews (the originals, entire set, from the 40′s?).  An entire original set of the Oz books.  Anything by Tolkien.  Books on all the U.S. presidents (Ok – that sectionl, I must admit, was boring to me). And behind one set of bookcases was an entire collection of National Geographic magazines, organized in piles by years.

People save books for different reasons.  Reference.  To preserve the good memory of reading it, sort of like looking at a photograph.  Smell.  Nothing like the smell of a library of old books.  Planning this move to Costa Rica has been hard because it has forced me to evaluate each of my books and decide which ones are worthy enough to move.  Thankfully, the invention of e-readers helps a little.  Many of the classics are now available for free download, so they can be donated.  But what about that classic that has my father’s name stamped inside the front cover, and includes his notes in the margins from the college class he took when I was a kid?  Hmmmm.  That’s a hard one.  Logic and money be damned, some books just have to come with me.  If only I were rich, I’d rent a climate-controlled space and save a whole library of books with family meaning.  But I’m not, and I suppose that’s that.

As I’m writing this blog, I’m thinking how good it feels to get this out.  Maybe that’ll be enough to make me write more?  I suppose we shall soon see if that is to be.

3 Comments »

  • Sarah said:

    Maybe you could store your books at your parents or something? You never know if you might come back to the U.S. someday. Moving overseas is so hard because you do have to make these sacrifices. I am nowhere near ready to move but I am already stressing myself out about all the stuff I want to bring with me, such as contact lenses, sunbutter, virgin coconut oil, beauty products, toiletries, etc., and you’ll want to bring as many children’s clothing as possible as they are spendy there. Also be aware that some ticos can’t resist stealing some cute little clothes, it happened to me when we were on vacation. My favorite little Baby Gap sundress. It took me awhile to reconcile that for the thief, that dress was even more special than it was to me. Ticos love stuff, most of them are poor and they still equate American stuff with quality, even if everything everywhere is pretty much made in China. You might need a few footed sleepers. It really does get chilly some nights. My babies slept in footed sleepers every night in Santa Ana. They protect from rogue bugs too.

    I love books too. I have pared down a lot in my life so I haven’t had any cool old books for a long time, and every since having kids it seems I only read practical reference-type books. I really miss cuddling up with a good novel. I always see myself in a hammock in CR getting caught up on books. I would love to have a book club there but sadly, it seems most Ticos do not read novels, and the expats where I lived struggled to get together once every few weeks for drinks so I imagine a book club would have been difficult. And with the internet, I think people read a lot less books. With things like e-readers too, books are an endangered species. I was happy to see vinyl records making a comeback. I sold a load of my parent’s records on ebay, resurrected from the depths of a moldy basement, given new life and shipped to all corners of the world. German prog-rock to still-sealed Simon and Garfunkel LPs made me some very nice cash, but at the same time, I feel a sort of emptiness in having sold all those records, having imagined the meaningfulness of that music to my young hippie parents, though I haven’t had the heart to part with my dad’s early blues. Not only are they worn out and scratched (but still play wonderfully), they are remnants of a childhood in an era that held so much promise. Needless to say, the records won’t be coming to CR. :(

    I hope your sciatica goes away soon. I suffered through that badly with my first pregnancy and not at all with my second, so I suppose birthing either aligns your pubic bone or misaligns it? I, too, am quieter while pregnant. For me though, my brain just isn’t functioning well. The baby pulls away every last vitamin in my blood it would seem and I am sort of unwell for a time even after giving birth, thanks to breastfeeding. This is very anecdotal though it has happened to myself, my mother and my husband, but once we stopped eating gluten (due to suspected gluten intolerance, which is particularly common in fair people), we all had crazy hair and nail growth due to increased mineral absorption. We all feel a lot better too. The diet in CR always makes me feel better, and now I think it’s because of the lack of much gluten in their diet. You’re almost there, and I think you’ll find the food, help, and sunshine will give you a big boost.

    Your blog is included in my daily roundup of Costa Rica blogs. It’s enjoyable for me to read about people changing their lives in a major way. I’ve always had a healthy dose of wanderlust but never have I been more tied down to a lifestyle than I am now, so I must live vicariously through others. We dream of a day not far off when we will be in CR ourselves, having fruit trees and chickens and the peace of mind to enjoy the little things in life instead of stressing about endless bills and pink late notices, and black ice, and smog, and $2 brown-fleshed avocados, oh and lately, shortages of produce in the grocery stores. Not liking that one bit. That said, we have to find happiness where we’re at and see our glass as half-full. Meanwhile, it’s fun to daydream.

  • Trish (author) said:

    Sarah,
    When you are in Costa Rica next, you might try one of the many local “Ropa Americana” stores. You can buy used clothing (baby through adult) that is very nice, comes right from the states, and is also quite cheap. Much of the stuff that Americans send to Goodwill actually eventually gets shipped to Central and South America and is sold in shops such as these.

    When you factor in how much it costs for me to ship a barrel of stuff down to CR, both out of pocket costs and cost to the environment, it really only makes a lot of sense to ship very heavy or valuable items. Things such as my Kitchenaid mixer, good quality tools, or things of sentimental value. Or things like Sunbutter, that are surely not available down there (I think I’ll be packing both Sunbutter and maple syrup, for sure!). Since the baby clothes are extremely cheap in CR, that was a hard one for me!

  • Sarah said:

    I actually never stepped foot in such a store while in Costa Rica so that’s something to remember for next time. I’d only been to the mall shops and they were always quite expensive. I buy a lot of kids clothing off ebay so I’ll probably stock up before I go. More and more we are not sure if we will be able to move this year even, given the economy and real estate market. Only God knows.

    Glad to see you appreciate Sunbutter too. I just love the stuff, and no icky-fungus-y peanuts involved. And yes, maple syrup is a must-bring item. Even at Automercado, the best you’ll find is Aunt Jemima, and I’d rather have none at all than that. I will bring my beloved Vitamix mixer, but I’m afraid my Le Creuset will have to stay, lest I pay dearly for the extra weight of them in my suitcase. It’s the thought of leaving behind certain creature comforts that is most difficult for me. I won’t be able to find a lot of the health food stuff I came to rely on here. The macrobioticas there are somewhat of a joke compared to Whole Foods or even small, local co-ops. Beware of inflation down there. Is that good or bad for people paying in dollars? I never did understand that stuff.

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